From Nursing Shortage to Glut: Vanishing Jobs in Economic Daze

June 21st, 2010  |  The Blog

The days of sign-up bonuses for nurses are gone. The reverse cycle is now in force, with hospitals closing units due to lack of inpatients. This ridiculous situation has of course nothing to do with unaffordable treatment or the sleazy pseudo business elements which have replaced medical considerations.

At this rate, medical colleges will stop training doctors because it’s too expensive and there’s nowhere for them to practice. The misanthropic process described as health care management has managed, if nothing else, to follow its circular logic a few steps further.

Evidence is emerging of a pattern in nursing employment which is faithfully reproducing the altruistic ethos of “Lower costs, higher fees”. Nurses are finding a blank zone where there was once surging demand. Hospitals are becoming a point of diminishing return for nursing careers. If the management culture doesn’t drive them out, opportunities elsewhere will.

Current Bureau of Labor Statistics figures predict that the lowest area of demand will be in hospitals. The highest will be in private practice, home health, and aged care and nursing.

So much for the theory that social reality gets any attention.

What about the people who need a hospital, maybe even one with people in it to provide health care?

If even the idea of hospital management is an actual concept in any practical form, what, exactly, is being managed?

Sick people or sick spreadsheets? Apparently the spreadsheets are in worse health than the people. They’re getting round the clock intensive care, all the time. My theory is that since people are no longer trained to manage either businesses or people, the only thing these neophytes know how to do is manage spreadsheets. That’s when they’re not in meetings, of course, discussing all the recent disasters since previous meetings.

Obviously, it’s better to have people with contagious/lethal diseases unable to afford even basic treatment than to have a rational and possibly intrusive employment policy.

(Perish the thought that mere relevance should become part of management science in any form. What if somebody on Earth accidentally figured out what they were supposed to be doing?)

There is, however, a compromise position, which will be fully endorsed by even the most uncomprehending manager: Medical conditions with audit trails.

If you’re dead, or trying to be, for example, you could get a receipt from your disease(s) in some acceptable form, like a death certificate, and take it to the hospital. People could spring into advanced apathy mode without needing to hire anyone.

Meanwhile, just keep the plagues coming and the jobs off the market, guys.

It’s such fun.

Paul Wallis
About Paul Wallis

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